What lies beneath the slipping mask????

Masking-is an often unconscious, coping mechanism where individuals with ADHD hide or suppress their symptoms to fit in, avoid stigma, or meet neurotypical social expectations. It acts as a "socially acceptable" facade, allowing people to conceal challenges with focus, hyperactivity, or organization. Common examples include forcing eye contact, scripting conversations, and overcompensating for disorganization, often resulting in severe mental burnout. - not my definition but explains it clearly.

Now I would say over the years I have learnt to mask very well, I also see masking in my autistic daughter especially around her school day, so its not something new to me or the family.  Its often said after you get a diagnosis the mask starts to slip more as you understand yourself and I would have to agree, especially after my wife also mentioned it.  Things like the kids all talking at once, youtube shorts playing too loud or the new number 1 irritation in my life the repetitive bouncing of a ball, all of these things cause the mask to slip and make me very short.  

When I was off work i found it easier to manage as I wasn't masking all day around others, but I would say since I'm back in an office environment , and trying to keep myself masked during the day it is slipping more at home in the evening and then it takes me time to decompress and want to be around people again.

My wife has suggested I get off the bus a few stops earlier in the evening and walk home as walking has always given me peace- I go for a walk each day at lunch and listen to music just to tune myself back in for the afternoon. I'm very lucky that the family understand what is happening when I get home but I do feel for my wife at times having me in one corner in an Adhd mood and then our autistic daughter in the other bouncing a ball whilst watching youtube lol.

One thing I am glad for is that I do have the ability to let the mask slip as I have a supportive circle around me and I know others may not have that, but everyone has the right to be themselves so don't feel ashamed, be open and honest and to quote Alex Partridge 'you are enough' , so its ok to have an off day.