Make Christmas work for you and yours
So I have been a bit MIA for a few weeks, between the Christmas madness, the new job hunt and just my own struggles to put my thoughts down, it ain't been easy. I know from some other well known ADHDers that idea graveyards exist, with websites and projects dying and i don't want this one to join that group.
We have had the elves back this year causing mischief, we have Elvis and Snowy and its great seeing the kids excitement every day when they get up to find them. A favorite was when they wrapped the Christmas tree in toilet paper. And our youngest loved when they got caught in a booby trap( moms bra).
The job hunt is exhausting and at times demoralizing- you think you have skills and your CV is solid but you don't even hear back from companies , this has changed from when I was last looking for a role. I know one will come and I am changing my scope a little and have looked at some roles with a well known autism charity but I just need to keep my head up.
I got a couple of nights out with my very amazing wife, these have been few and far between this year so it was great to get in a concert and a birthday party in over the Xmas period without the kids and I have to say we enjoyed both and I really hope we can do it more in 2026 as its something I love and have missed and I know she would love it too. And its important for us ad our energy can be sapped, we have read that the stress you feel as a parent to an autistic child is similar to battlefield stress on your body and mind, and for my wife she is also trying to manage me and my situation.
On Christmas day we changed it up from last year a little, we did things that would make life easier for our daughter and in turn everyone around her. Last year she was very overstimulated and Christmas dinner didn't go to plan so we done it at home this year, we then visited my wife's family to open gifts. It wasn't perfect but was a whole lot better and I think the key take away is ' Focus on what works for your family and then fit the other pieces around that'. My girl was happy at the end of the day and wasn't exhausted from masking all day so if she is happy we are happy.
And I feel the same about my ADHD once I can manage it with my wife and family I'm happy- they have seen me at my best but more importantly my worst and lowest and are always there for me. Don't get me wrong its a full time job for my wife managing me and our daughter and our 2 boys and her own full time job and she doesn't get enough credit for any of it.